Top 10 Lies We Tell Ourselves
10 I will never love another the same way
This is not true. The ability to love is something we, as humans, need to be proud of and need to understand that change is the only constant and adopt that ideology.
9 I’m stuck with people who hurt me
Bob Marley once said “the truth is everyone’s going to hurt you. You just need to find the people worth suffering for”. Besides, nobody can hurt you without your permission. So, everybody is not out there to get you; you need to look out for yourself and have a sense of self.
8 Love conquers all
If you’re hanging onto a disastrous relationship only because you think love is enough to sustain all, I hate break your bubble, but you’re wrong. It’s not wrong to assume such things initially, because love leaves us feeling all gooey and mushy, but we need to see the light. If there are constant fights over fundamentals, or ideals then you need to walk out of that relationship and understand that love alone cannot survive, it needs to be accompanied by compatibility in ideals, interests and hobbies.
7 My dreams are impossible
As humans, we are constantly expecting the worst. And to top that, we’re not exactly always surrounded by well wishers. So we have people telling us you can’t do this, you can’t do that, etc. Nobody can tell us, not even ourselves, that our dreams are too exaggerated, or impossible to achieve. Again, it boils down to the fact that we’re afraid to take a step, take a fall.
6 I have way too much lost
There is no way to figure out what you’ve got to lose unless you try. Probably you’re exaggerating your losses here because you don’t want to take that step with all your heart and you’re afraid of change. When you want something with all your gut, you wouldn’t be so afraid.
5 There’s no one else out there for me
There are 6 billion people in the world so there is definitely someone out there! Only because one insensitive, jerk of a guy/girl dumped you, doesn’t mean you have to internalize the break up and feel that no other person will ever love you the same. Agreed that not all of us look like movie stars and maybe it’s harder for some of us to find that someone special than some others, but as they say, its only when you stop looking for something you actually find it.
4 He needs me
No, he doesn’t. If you’re holding onto to a grown man, then you probably need him more than he does. A grown man can take care of himself, do things for himself and if he claims he “needs” you, it’s either because he’s using you or because he’s still a teenager in his head that needs you to mother him.
3 I can’t live without him/her/them
Maybe you’ve lost a friend after a bad relationship, maybe you’ve lost someone to death but ‘I can’t live anymore’ is a wrong notion. It will definitely be different and maybe very difficult, but it doesn’t mean you cannot move on. Our Glorified human race is accredited with the ability to change and grow and evolve, emotionally and intellectually. So, yes you can very well live without him/her/them because people come and people go, and you will find salvation in new people.
2 It can’t get any worse than this
Did you just get out of a bad relationship? Did you get yelled at by your horrible, blood-sucking boss? Do you feel like it can’t get any worse and you’ve gone into a cycle of depression? Well, it can get worse. The problem is, we’re not very well versed with using the concept of relativity. If we could just for a second, stop and look at some of the third world problems, we’d realize that our issues are nothing in comparison. Bottom line: It can get worse.
1 He/She will change
This is a classic lie which men and women tell themselves in a relationship. Women are constantly expecting men to change, to grow, maybe clean up their act, expect them to stick to their word, but men will be men. Men are constantly expecting and hoping that women will be less emotional, or make you that sandwich without you having to ask, but one can’t change his/her nature and what’s essential and integral to them, and we need to understand that and change what we can within.
In totality, it seems like we like being miserable because it’s a comfortable bubble. But we need to start listening to that little voice inside our heads which is constantly trying to kick some rationality in us.